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THE

Defender Picks

 

Mercedi

March 4th

Shpongle

Civic Theater
Simon Gosford and Raja Ram’s uber eclectic sound

 

Pelicans v. Pistons
SKC, 7p.m.
Surging Birds face Detroit without Brow

 

Kevin James

Mahalia Jackson, 7p.m.

The comedy pops off with the King of Queens

 

The Southern Food and Beverage Museum, 6-8:30p.m.
9 bartenders compete for the high ball

Jeudi

March 5th

Jyl Benson and Sam Hanna
Octavia Books, 6p.m.
New book focuses on New Orleans' Casual Restaurant Recipes

 

Bounce ft. Sissy Nobby

Republic, 10p.m.

Wobble, baby

 

The Soul Rebels

Le Bon Temps Rouler, 10p.m.

Enjoy these brass rebels and a game of pool!

 

Greensky Bluegrass

Tipitina’s, 8:30p.m.

This Michigan quintet knows how to rock bluegrass

Vendredi

March 6th

Six Years of Beers

NOLA Brewing Co, 5:30p.m.

Release of the 6th Anniversary Ale (a sour ale this year) ft. music with Tauk, Gravity A, New Orleans Suspects

 

Gogol Bordello

House of Blues, 9p.m.

Gypsy Punk band from the Lower East Side

 

Francisco Goldman

Tulane Auditorium, 6p.m.

Academic all-star chats about Interior Circuit

 

Celtics v. Pelicans

SKC, 7p.m

 

Mario Cart Challenge

Republic, Doors 10p.m., free before 12 w/ college ID

Multiple N64s set up for the annual Mario Kart Challenge - compete to win a section and bottle of booze; music by DJ G

Samedi

March 7th

Julia Street

Monthly art crawl, 6-9p.m.

 

Haiku With Ghosts

Foundation Gallery, 6-10p.m.

Opening reception for Demond Matsuo’s new show

 

Soul Fest

Audubon Zoo, 10a.m.-5:30p.m.

Day 1 of music, food and fun at the zoo!

 

Jim Roche: Culture Mechanic

Ogden, 6p.m.

Opening of acclaimed retrospective

 

Grizzlies v. Pelicans

SKC, 6p.m.

 

Katt Williams

Lakefront Arena, 8p.m.

Popular comedian on his Born Again...Again tour

 

Tank and the Bangas

Old US Mint, 8p.m.

Local spoken wordsmiths exude creativity through song

Dimanche

March 8th

Tobymac, Mandisa, & Capital Kings

Saenger Theater, 7p.m.

Grammy Award Winners on tour w/ electronic pop duo the Capital Kings

 

Bo Burnham (Sold Out)

Civic Theater, 8p.m.

Wunderkind comedian wombed on the web

 

Glen David Andrews

Botanical Gardens, 4p.m.

Party in the Garden with Andrews and Swamp Donkeys

 

Soul Fest

Audubon Zoo, 10a.m.-5:30p.m.

Day 2 of music, food and fun at the zoo!


Krewe du Vieux Comes Early, Often in 2013


With an early Mardi Gras, Carnival krewes have less time to get their floats and costumes ready. Plus, the marching groups had to do the Super Bowl shuffle to make way for the Big Game. The parade season tone-setters of Krewe du Vieux - who are already under the gun for this year's Jan. 19 march - could be complaining about being in a world of shit as a result of these developments. But, as always, they've simply released Le Monde de Merde for the rest of us to roll around in with glee, and announced a theme that cuts off all feelings of misery and misfortune marked by daily life in the City of Dreams at the head.

 

Krewe du Vieux's 2013 theme is "Krewe du Vieux Comes Early," according to their recently-published annual newspaper, Le Monde de Merde. After summarizing a year of Bounties, TP cutbacks and the Crescent City's usual political tomfoolery, the krewe that relies on old-fashioned ass-drawn floats and outrageous satire announced once again that only one krewe can cut down all that is sacred, and turn all that is proper into sexual innuendo and bathroom humor.

 

"The pre-mature Krewe members will come early and often come hell or high water until the cows come home," the paper heralds.

 

This year's Queen is New Orleans Musicians Clinic executive director Bethany Bultman. As the director of the organization that provides health care to the city's many players and one of the many state health care providers made to feel ill following Bobby Jindal's budget cuts, Bultman "has come to the forefront of our cultural preservation efforts," according to the Krewe.

 

As ever, Le Monde de Merde also gives Carnival watchers a sneak peek at some of this year's satire. Floats themes this year are heavily targeted in the direction of the Newhouses and the Times-Picayune, whose decision to cut back publication to three days a week took up the city's civic conversation for most of the second half of the year.

 

Krewe of Comatose will march with "The Times Prickayune Fails to Deliver," while K.A.O.S. will hold up "Black and White and Dead All Over." Drips and Discharges, meanwhile, announces to the Merde that they're "Fresh Outta TP."

 

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell is also a piece of red meat for the skewer, as the Saints' Bountygate scandal gave the city an Enemy No. 1, and tanked the Black and Gold season before it started.

 

Krewe of SPANK will unveil their ultrapostmodern classic "Waiting for Goodell," while Krewe of Underwear will show how the "NFL Penetrates Carnival." Meanwhile, the Mystic Krewe of Inane will get us ready for Super Hole XLVAG," while Mama Roux will prepare the way of the "Stuper Bowl."

 

But it's not all football and newsprint. T.O.K.I.N. will introduce the masses to YoMamaCare, while the Krewe of Spermes will take the parade's theme to new scientific heights by exploring what truly came first, the chicken or the egg? Proving that this year's krewe is extraordinarily fowl, Seeds of Decline will allow us to Choke More Chikn.

 

Having ready this handy summary, NoDef is fully aware that readers will have no idea what any of this looks like. Pick up a Le Monde de Merde at newsstands around the city, or head to Krewe du Vieux at 6:30 p.m. on Jan. 19 in the Marigny and French Quarter (route pictured) to see it in the exposed flesh.




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Contributors:

Dead Huey Long, Emma Boyce, Elizabeth Davas, Ian Hoch, Lindsay Mack, Anna Gaca, Jason Raymond, Lee Matalone, Phil Yiannopoulos, Joe Shriner, Chris Staudinger, Chef Anthony Scanio, Tierney Monaghan, Stacy Coco, Rob Ingraham,

Staff Writers

Cheryl Castjohn, Sam Nelson

Art Listings

Cheryl Castjohn

Photographers

Brandon Roberts, Rachel June, Daniel Paschall

Film Critic

Jason Raymond

Puzzler

Paolo Roy

Art Director:

Michael Weber, B.A.

Editor:

B. E. Mintz

Published Daily by

Minced Media, Inc.

Editor Emeritus



Stephen Babcock